Brass Birthday Monkeys

Yes, boys and girls, it's that time again for Kevin and Darren's birthday celebration (and for those of you who don't know, Darren and I have the exact same bithday, except I'm one year older). This year, we decided to stay true to our Japanese roots and go karaoke-ing at Caffe Brass Monkey. Speaking of staying true to Japanese, I have to correct the countless people out there in the United States who incorrectly pronounce this activity as "keh-ree-oh-kee" because it should be pronounced "kah-rah-oh-keh" just like it's spelled (since when do the letters "kara" make the sound "keh-ree"?).



Before we headed to the Brass Monkey, I picked up some gear for the party at the neighborhood surplus store, including this security officer hat and shirt. It was blatant foreshadowing of the serious need for some policing that night, both from an alcohol consumption standpoint and from a rowdiness standpoint.



Jake opted against purchasing any new gear and instead rummaged through his Ross-esque wardrobe and sported some of his best karaoke attire, as you can clearly see.



Both Jake and I got out of work early, picked up some attire, grabbed a quick bite, and then joined Frosty and E.J. (who had arrived early to reserve an area) at the Brass Monkey. Good job, gentlemen.



Once we arrived, Jake presented me with his gift... a bunch of scratchers. Quite often, Jake and I (and sometimes Brooke) grab lottery tickets during our lunch hour, so getting me a ton of lottery tickets for my birthday was an appropriate gift. Although jake tends to win often, luck is usually not on my side, and there was no reason for that to change just because it was my birthday.



This is me in disbelief that I had no real winning ticket (other than a couple of free tickets) among the numerous scratchers. Could this really be the case?



Apparently so. All of these were losers.



Speaking of losers, the other birthday boy arrived shorly after the scratching and I gave him this Vietnam veteran hat I picked up for him at the surplus store. Looks good on you, Pvt. Dirty.



But my hat is still better than yours. Especially when I'm lounging with a drink in my hand. Time to get this party started!



Early in the evening, Jake was already expressing an interest in getting on stage to sing his heart out. And don't worry, there will be plenty of singing to come.



But first, Frosty presented us with his gift... a couple of T-shirts with a special message for each of us. Nice work, Frosty.



Brooke also made an early appearance to wish me a happy birthday.



And so did Dana, Haley and her boyfriend, Danny, who all enjoyed some tasty beverages as more and more guests arrived.



Mia (who I think looks a little like Jada Pinkett) made it out and perused the song list for a tune worthy of being performed.



Likewise, Darren and I scanned the list to find something that we could sing and not embarrass ourselves while doing so. We later realized, after making idiots of ourselves on stage multiple times, that this was a search for the impossible. But hey, who cares?... it's our birthdays!



It should be noted that although Brooke and Dana made an appearance, they left shortly after this picture was taken to join a bunch of losers for "more important" plans.



But what could be more important that this? Frosty is closer to a girl than he has ever been in his life (even if it is Annabelle) and be forewarned that this is a mere indication of what the night would bring. Something tells me this is going to get worse before it gets better.



Apparently, Darren agrees.



Darren's little sister, Tracer, and her boyfriend, Matt, showed up and joined the fun. Matt's a really cool dude, but thinks we're a rowdy bunch, especially when we're neckchopping each other. And we did nothing that night to convince him otherwise.



Eventually, Ingrid arrived after finally escaping from the office. Looks like she had some trouble getting past security...



I was so happy to see her, I could hardly contain myself... ummm, my drink is empty.



Ingrid thought my karaoke security gear was downright dumb, but that didn't stop her from giving me a present for my birthday. Thanks, love.



Ahhh... The birthday boys' ladies. How lovely.



The night was full of surprises, and my brother and Amy even showed up... with a gift too! Now when my brother makes an appearance at an event, you know it's time to celebrate.



And what better way to celebrate than with some shots!!! Not too keen on the fruity selection, but you'll hear no complaints from me.



The shots were extremely fruity, but we all had our share... even the waitress.



Ummm... These extra shots were calling my name and I couldn't resist. Forgive me.



Way, way too much fruity goodness left me feeling a bit queasy. Or perhaps it was all of the alcohol I had consumed by that point. Haley could clearly relate. As far as I know, there's really only one way to deal with those feelings. How, you ask?



Simple. Get on stage in a crowded karaoke bar and embarrass yourself in front of family, friends and strangers. Jake and I were the first up and we selected a real crowd-pleaser for our first performance. We perormed none other than Jake's favorite hit, Patrick Swayze's "She's Like the Wind" from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack. I'm not sure what's worse... The fact that Patrick Swayze has a song that made the Brass Monkey song list or the fact that Jake and I actually know the words to it. And for those of you who don't believe that we would really get up and sing a song like this...



... guess again. There's proof in the lyrics up there on the screen. Oh yeah! Go Patrick Swayze!



To feel her breath on my face
Her body close to me
Cant look in her eyes
She's out of my league

Just a fool to believe (Just a fool to believe)
I have anything she needs
She's like the wind

Speaking of fools, I've just decided... We're fools for singing this song.



But we weren't the only ones out there. Darren and Annabelle were next on the mic, and what better song for the two lovebirds to sing than the chart-topping duet by Lionel Richie and Diana Ross, "Endless Love"!! I mean, honestly, will the entertainment never cease?!?



And now for a Kevingrid first... live video!! Thanks to Jake who captured this great clip, we can all view live video of Lionel's and Diana's noteworthy performance. Diana's reaction at the end of the song is priceless.



Man!... I'm a great singer, aren't I, babe?... Arent I?... Babe?



Well great singer or not, I felt like a superstar. My brother seems to disagree with that notion. Probably because he's somewhat sober.



This, on the other hand, is not a sober person. I think it was about this time that my memory of the evening stars to get fuzzy. But what I do recall is that this is about the time that strange things started happening.



Like this...



And this...



And this...



And let's not forget this...



Well with all the strange happenings going on, it was clearly time for one thing, and one thing only... Neckchops!



Yes guys... tell me about it. I've got some strange friends.



I love how in this picture, Darren and Ernie appear to be "encouraging" Annabelle and the waitress to get closer together.



I forgot to mention earlier that Ingrid's best friend, Ingrid, made it out too. They have the same name, are both wearing black, and both have their eyes closed for this shot. Apparently they do everything together!



Ingrid's friend Ingrid's friend Celli also joined the fun (confusing, I know).



At some point during the night, someone secretly inserted Darren's name together with an Enrique Iglesias song into the cue and later in the night, Darren was called to stage to perform. He was certainly stiff up there. That was until I joined him in being an asshole on stage and sang an extremely lame song! Great...



And shortly after our stellar performance, we were again called to the stage. But this time, rather than have us sing, everyone in attendance sang Happy Birthday to us! Of course, being the karaoke-happy person I was that night, I couldn't help but join in. Check out the video above by clicking on the play button. Seeing me sing Happy Birthday to myself in this video still makes me laugh... and the surprise from Ingrid at the end is fantastic. She always comes through.



Mmmmm! What a wonderful cake!



Ummmm, who the f**k ordered more shots?!?!



Thankfully, Ingrid was there to render first-aid and fed me fries and water. That is water, right Ingrid? Hmmmmmm...



Jake, I think it's time for you and me to once again get up on stage and sing another song. Hey, before we go up there, has anyone ever told you you're handsome?



Wait a minute... Give me a second to put on my birthday shirt. Okay, now I'm ready!



Having changed into my superhero outfit, I really can't think of a more appropriate song to have sung than the theme from the "The Greatest American Hero"!

Look at what's happened to me,
I can't believe it myself.
Suddenly I'm up on top of the world,
It should've been somebody else.

Believe it or not,
I'm walking on air.
I never thought I could feel so free.
Flying away on a wing and a prayer.
Who could it be?
Believe it or not it's just me.

Well, by this point in the night, so many pictures were taken that both Jake's camera and my camera had run out of batteries. In any event, the night quickly took a downward spiral when Darren and I got into an argument about whose birthday party it really was. I think we kept insisting to one another that "It's my birthday party, not yours!" And shortly thereafter, the night came to an end as we were kindly escorted out of the bar. As always, good times.